We felt he was the right child for us
Read how adopting Stephen changed one same-sex couple's lives for the better
Since Paul and Mark adopted Stephen through Coram, the cheeky six-year-old's attachment to them has grown.
The couple always knew they wanted to have children of their own and, after considering their options, they decided adoption would be the best route for them.
“We went to an open evening for Coram where they were very open and honest about the process of adoption, but also very reassuring about the level of support they could offer. Coram just ticked a lot of boxes for us and felt right. We found the process itself very efficient, our social worker was very reliable and really supportive.”
The adoption process with Coram took the couple nine months, and they adopted Stephen after he had been in care for one year.
“I think we were pretty certain he was the one, when we saw his photo and information pack we just knew. I think you begin your attachment at that point, we just felt he was the right child for us.”
The couple’s life has changed dramatically since becoming parents, however Paul says: “You obviously don’t socialise in the same way as you used to, and you can’t go out as much. But we don’t miss any of that. Mostly because we’re just really happy having Stephen at home with us and putting him to bed and watching TV together; being a family. Life does change but nothing is missed.”
The couple are currently in the process of being approved by Coram for their second child, so Stephen will hopefully have a sibling soon. Paul said that Stephen is “a cheeky six-year-old, very energetic, very lively, and a real character with a brilliant sense of humour. He is generally a happy little boy and is aware of his life story. He has a strong attachment with us and really enjoys family life.”
The couple spoke about the usefulness of Coram’s parenting course, Paul said that “meeting other adoptive parents was very helpful. They are also members of New Family Social, and Paul recommends joining this group as “when we were just beginning the journey of adoption, it was great to be able to go to New Family Social’s events and meet other LGBT adopters and just compare notes and ask questions in a really relaxed way. It was very reassuring that we could become a family too one day.”
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